He appears in all respects to be a normal baby. But He has a special gift. A sixth sense, if you will. His instincts tell him when Mommy has opened Textbook. Such an indignity is this that it requires instant awakening, screaming, and demanding of the cuddles.
Yes, his nemesis is named Textbook, and the subservient Mommy shall not venture too near the heinous beast lest it eat her. Or something.
Thus, Mommy is not permitted to do her module 3 readings, and no further assignments shall be completed. He has so decreed it. He is unable to provide a note for school, as He can neither read nor write.
Suck it up, Mommy. Thou shalt not prevail.
This kind of thing is a significant part of my life just now. But you know what makes it all worthwhile? It's those special heartfelt moments. Those wonderous and magical times. Like when you lie down, and the baby lies on top of you, tummy to tummy, and he looks down at you, gazing deep into your eyes, his little face full of love, and then he throws up right into your mouth.
That's the kind of precious memory that's all kinds of awesomeness. But you know what would be even better? That's right; no vomit!
He means business!