Every time you shift your weight, you take a piece of knee with you

First, let me just say:

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD DOES THIS EVER FLIPPIN' HURT!!! PLEASE MAKE IT STOP!!!!!

I'm being as delicate as possible with the broken knee. But it still gets jostled. People in the house bump it. Sometimes, my own movements cause great pain. And whenever I need to change or feed N, it's excruciating. Somehow, that baby has the ability to put all of his weight on my lower left thigh and push down toward the break. I try to adjust him, but he's apparently quite determined.

At least I'm down to two Percocet a day now. I only take them at night. Just 'cause they last longer than Tylenol, so I don't awake in the wee small hours in agony. But the rest of the day, I get by with the Tylenol. That's pretty good, I'd say. The Tylenol doesn't make me as sleepy, and it has never caused a hallucination. Plus it's safe for nursing. So that's always nice.

It has been two weeks since the surgery. I hope the pain will start to subside soon. But thus far, it's generally around a 7 or 8 out of 10. If it's not jostled at all, it sometimes gets down to a 5. But that kind of thing is always short-lived. 'Cause someone's got to bang into it. H has walked into it (rarely). J loves to cuddle, and he actually kicks it (frequently). Of course, N likes to lie on it (almost constantly). And even I sometimes jostle it and get myself in a heap of trouble (more than you'd think - I'm a total klutz).

It's still swollen, though that seems to be going down. It's still reluctant to bend, though that seems to be improving ever so slowly. I can get it to almost a 45 degree angle now, but it is very uncomfortable to do so. I wonder how much physio will be required and when I might expect to be able to bend it properly. The doctors have said it will never be the same again, so part of me wonders if I will ever again be able to bend it properly. I try to banish those thoughts, but they are there. Oh, I dearly hope it will bend properly at some point!

I'm worried about the physio. I'm worried about recovery. I'm concerned that it still hurts so much two weeks post-op. And of course, I'm terribly annoyed with myself. I had just recently gotten off bed rest, and now I'm restricted once more just because I'm clumsy. Hardly seems fair. There are worse sins than clumsiness, aren't there? Ok, fine; I'm really clumsy. But still!!

Anyway, the Percocet is starting to kick in, and I'd best stop typing before something odd happens. Like what, you ask? Well obviously, like my being sucked into the computer, or turning into a giant robin, or some such thing. 'Cause Percocet can be like that. Or not. It's wildly unpredictable stuff, I've found. At least the knee doesn't hurt as badly when I'm flying around the neighbourhood.

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