Friday, October 20, 2006

A sleeping baby

J sleeps. He fell asleep in the car while we were driving. We were going to a friend's housewarming party this evening. We decided that we should not wake the sleeping J for partying and then try to get him to go back to sleep later. Better to miss the festivities and let J have a good night's sleep.

Do not wake the sleeping baby.

We got home. J awoke as we pulled up to the house. He cried briefly. I cuddled him close, and carried him upstairs. I kissed him goodnight, and then put him in his little crib with his bear, monkey, blankie, sippy, and sucky-thing.

Do not wake the sleeping baby.

I covered J with his blankie, so he would stay nice and warm. He curled up on his tummy, with his knees pulled up under him and his little bottom sticking way up in the air, just as he always does when he's really tired. He went to sleep right away. And I rubbed his back and told him how much I love him.

Do not wake the sleeping baby.

Then I retired to the office to work on my course. I intended to read through more of Module 6, but I opted instead to get busy with my midterm assignment. It is due in two and a half weeks, and I will run out of time pretty quickly if I don't get moving on it. I made a good start, and feel pleased with my accomplishment.

Do not wake the sleeping baby.

Soon, I will go to bed myself. I will go and check on J. I will find that he has moved to the opposite end of the crib, has kicked his blankie off, and has spat out his sucky-thing.

Do not wake the sleeping baby.

J will awake briefly in the dead of night crying frantically because he can no longer find the sucky-thing. I will get up and find the sucky. Once he has his sucky back, he will likely fall asleep again and go straight through the night. But he'll probably wake up around 6:00 am and want to cuddle in the big bed for a bit. It's his routine. It's familiar.

Do not wake the sleeping baby.

Last week, I spent so much time at doctor's offices. I am behind in my studies again. I must work hard this weekend and get caught up.

Do not wake the sleeping baby.

Tomorrow, I have to skip out on swimming. It is unadvisable to spend time splashing around in a pool while recovering from a kidney infection. H will go swimming with J, while I continue with my studying. I must get through Module 6 this weekend so that I can write my quiz. It's due by Wednesday at noon.

Do not wake the sleeping baby.

I feel deprived. These days, I don't get to spend as much time with J as I would like. I spend a lot of time at work, and then I have to study. J usually gets tired and grumpy shortly after I get home, and then it's time for him to go to sleep. Typically, I get a brief period of play time, and then some cuddles. But it's never enough.

Do not wake the sleeping baby.

Never enough. ... I look forward to my weekends. Then, I will get to spend more time with J. Except that I don't get to spend more time with J at all. Instead, I have to hole up in the office and study. I miss all the playing. I miss all the cuddles. I miss my baby. Very much.

Do not wake the sleeping baby.

And tomorrow, I will miss swimming too!

Do not wake the sleeping baby.

I am tired of studying. It keeps me away from my child. And I just want to hold my baby.

Do not wake the sleeping baby.

I am his mother. I should get more time to be with him. I want quality time with my child. I just dearly want to hold him. And cuddle him. And play with him.

Do not wake the sleeping baby.

But I want to hold him! Right now!!

Do not wake the sleeping baby.

Oh, what do you know, anyway?

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