Wednesday, September 13, 2006


I am tired. I am tired of being a fat girl. Can't find clothes to fit, nor a flattering hairstyle. Everything makes me look huge. Because I am huge. I feel like I am starting to look my age, and I hate it. My age is ... old. Drunken homeless people stop me on the street to ask for change, and then they tell me that I'm ugly. I try to lose the weight, but I just can't seem to do it. Fat and ugly, and that's who I am. Apparently.

Also, sick. Sick this week. Have a cold. Last night, managed to fight off an impending migraine. Still not all better. Have to leave for work soon.

Must get in better spirits. I can't feel like this at work. It's a fantastic job, and I like it a lot. I'm sure my mood will improve while I'm there. Isn't that an interesting concept ... work improving your mood. First job I've ever had that can accomplish that one.

Very busy. Work, school, family. No time to feel poorly.

But I do.


Draya's Mom said...

Hon, you are NOT ugly!! Yes, some weight loss would be a good thing but you are a beautiful woman... mother... wife (as I'm sure H will agree) and friend!
God knows we ALL have our dowdy moments... months... years... but you are an extremely smart, talented & pretty lady with georgeous facial features!
What the heck do deranged and druken homeless people know? They are just lashing out becasue you won't give them any money. They should
A) look in a mirror (most aren't to good-looking themselves)
B)get some psychological help if they need it
C) get jobs

You are NOT old either. Everyone claims to be 'old' these days, I blame it on the places that call 55 year olds seniors. It's all a marketing ploy to bring in the bucks. 55 is not old, heck 65 isn't really old either... talk to me when your 80 then maybe I'll concede but your still not even half way to that yet!!!

PS I hope your cold hits the road and you feel better soon!

OOOO hugs

Nezbitt said...

I agree. You are not ugly in the slightest!!
And just who the F#%k is some stranger to tell you what you are?!? (I hope karma delivers a swift kick to the junk for that one!)
How about trusting your friends who know you? You are talented and lovely and a multitude of other things that I can only aspire to be!
And old is all in the mind. I personally plan on being a Toys 'R' Us kid for much, much longer!

Love and hugs (as many as you can handle!)

Trish said...

Thanks guys. I was having an off moment. I'll work more on the weight issue, and maybe I'll feel a little better about it all. Just kind of felling blech right now; you know how that is.

You're both wonderful! I'm glad I have you in my corner.

Liz said...

I want to say something supportive, but I'm afraid you'll just think, "Shut up, skinny chick." But really, we tend to find people that we like to be attractive and people that we don't like to be unattractive. If you could just see yourself through your friend's eyes, you would see how really beautiful you are to us.

Trish said...

Shut up, skinny chick! ;)

Seriously, though, thanks for that. I was just having a down kind of mood there. I feel better now. Yes, I need to drop some weight. But I'll work on it, and it will be better.

I just have those moments, y'know?