On my way home from work today, I heard an ad on the radio. A carefully crafted and well thought out ad, indeed. An ad in which an excited post-surgery patient talks about the wonders that are laser eye surgery.
Did you know that there are things you can't do when you have glasses? I mean, other than the obvious. You know, experiencing unaided sight and all. But other common tasks that the non-myopic person must surely take for granted. These are the things we glasses-wearing folk can't possibly accomplish, because of our severe, limiting disability.
Things like ... washing our cars!
Now, I personally had no idea that I could not wash my own car because I wear glasses. But it makes sense. Picture me, bucket of suds in my hand, glasses perched on my nose. I try, and I try. But then, I get these water droplets all over my lenses. So I take them off so I can dry them. And ... wait! Where did the car go! I can't see!! I can't see!!! Oh, won't someone please help me?!!
You know, this has never happened to me. So clearly, I must have been doing it wrong all these years. But it must be tough for carwash managers to find employees, being as they are limited only to those candidates with 20/20 vision. I mean, think of the damage a myopic employee could do! Suddenly, it all becomes clear.
So what I'm saying is this. I wear glasses. So someone had better get over here and wash my car for me!
That, and I await my disabled placard for my (newly cleaned) car. I am sure it will be forthcoming.
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