Birds of a Feather

J loves birdies. Sometimes, he gets confused about what they are, but he loves them nonetheless.

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J: (Pointing excitedly) That's a penguin!
H: (Looking where J is pointing) No, J. That's a magpie.
J: Ooooh ... magpie.
H: Yes. Magpie.
J: No magpie! PENGUIN!!
H: Okay, fine. It's a penguin.

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H: J wanted to tell you that he gave rocks to the birdies on the piano.
T: Oh. ... Wait. What birdies on the piano?
H: Well, he thinks those wooden monkeys up there are birds.

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H: Are you magical?
J: No!
H: Are you magnificent?
J: No!
H: Are you magnanimous?
J: No! I'm a magpie! ROAR!!!!

911 Emergency

My friend, Morgan, posted this on her blog. It was so funny, I just had to share it here.

Enjoy!

911 Emergency

Camera shopping

Lazy salespeople bug me. I swear, the woman was standing about 4 feet away, doing absolutely nothing. She was pointedly eavesdropping on our conversation, noticing that we were serious shoppers, and observing that we were having trouble with floor models that were not working. And she didn't even say "May I help you?" She deserved what she got. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

H: I think this camera looks good.
T: Me too.
H: Good price, huh?
T: I think so.
H: Should we get it?
T: No.
H: No?
T: (loudly while staring at lazy salesgirl) I refuse to buy a camera from a place where no salesperson comes to ask if we need help! Look at her, just standing there staring at us! Listening to us talking about how the batteries in the display models are dead so we can't see how they work, and doing absolutely nothing! And we're the only people in here! What is wrong with her?! You know, we're friends with the manager. I'm gonna go call him right now, so I can tell him that she's a great big ...
H: Uhhhh ... We should go.

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No camera case requires weatherproofing that badly.

H: Look at this camera case!
T: Well, it's nice. But ...
H: It has a raincover!
T: Uh huh.
H: Check it out! See? It has a raincover!
T: It's $500.
H: Yeah. But it has a raincover!

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So many modes, so little time.

H: Interesting. This camera has a "Food" mode.
T: Quick! Throw it at the food court! Maybe it'll fetch us a snack!
H: No. It's for taking pictures of food.
T: If it doesn't make me dinner, I don't want it.

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Eventually, we found a suitable store. We bought a new digital camera. It's nice. It has a case. The case has a raincover. The case was not $500. Because we are not crazy.

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Yes, Holly, I see the irony. We have a camera, and absolutely no time to upload pictures, burn CD's, or send an email. Cry me a river.

Discussions and Desserts

We'd eaten dinner. We were having apple pie for dessert. H and I were reading sections of the paper. J was playing with his food and not really eating it. Jazzy and Jiver, the kitties, were scrounging under the table. All a normal evening. And then ...

J: (singing) Three blind mice! Three blind mice!

T: This ad really irks me.

H: (referring to a help wanted ad we saw last night) Why? Does it have a prostitute in it?

T: No. But listen to this:

"Cherished traditions and simle pleasures! $585,000
Over 2700 sf of ... "

H: SIMPLE pleasures?!?!?!

T: Oh, you got that, did you? Was it the $585,000 or the 2700 square feet that got you?

J: Three blind ... uh-oh ... J dropped apple pie on Jazzy!

Puppy-Hit-You, and other animal tidbits

J's Memaw stopped by the other day. She gave J a boxing kangaroo from Australia.

T: Is that a kangaroo?
J: No! Puppy!

J has affectionately named his kangaroo "Puppy-Hit-You". Even though he now seems to accept that it is in fact a kangaroo rather than a puppy, he still calls him "Puppy-Hit-You". He loves his kangaroo, and uses it as a pillow when he sleeps. Such a sweet little boy!

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On the subject of naming conventions, we found a second smaller snuggly stuffed panda for J to hold and play with. He loves both of his pandas, though the original Panda is still his favorite. He went to visit his Grandma, and he took both pandas with him.

G: (Pointing to the newer panda) Oh! And what's his name?
J: Other-Panda.

My son, folks. Cute as all get out, but not terribly creative just now.

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J has learned all kinds of animal sounds. He has learned that sheep say "Baa", and pigs say "Oink". He has learned that lions say "ROAR" (and since this is his favorite animal sound, he has attributed it to any silent animal, also. Who knew giraffes and kangaroos say "ROAR"). He has learned that goats have horns and that sheep have no horns. And he has named his little stuffed sheep "Sheepy-No-Horns" just to bring that point home. But he can't quite get the goat noise down.

T: What does a sheep say?
J: Baa!
T: What does a cow say?
J: Moo!
T: What does a piggy say?
J: Oink!
T: What does a goat say?
J: Sheepy-No-Horns!

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J can consistently count to 4 on his own. But then he often gets confused. It is clear, however, that his favorite number is 7.

J: 1 ... 2 ... 3 ... 4 ... 7 ... 8 ... 7 ... 5 ... 7 ...

While we know that he can consistently count to 4, he doesn't really seem to know what the numbers mean. He does not relate "one" or "two" to the actual number of objects present. We trust that will come eventually.

We were out for a short time this evening. We passed a woman. She was walking her dog. Just one dog. And she was by herself.

J: (Pointing out the window at her) Two puppies!
H: J, that's not very nice.

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J answers any "Are you a ..." type question with "No! I'm a baby!" For example:

T: Are you a big boy?
J: No! I'm a baby!

The other night, we were driving in the car. J was trying to order us around ... typical 2-year old.

H: Stop being so bossy.
J: No! I'm a baby!
H: Are you bossy?
J: No! I'm a baby!
H: You're bossy.
J: No! I'm a baby!
H: You're a bossy baby.
J: No! I'm a ... I'm a kangaroo!

Time for myself

Today, my chiropractor asked me if I was making any "time for myself".

I'd like to have answered yes. But I'm not quite sure what his mysterious phrase means.

Thoughts?

Things you never thought you'd hear yourself say

T: Help! My shoes are stuck together!

H: Do you love me despite the whole "Polish" thing?

(No, H is not being a biggot here. He was hooking up some software and, when it asked him to choose a language, he hit the wrong thing and picked ... Polish? Czechoslovakian? Who can tell? ... And then, he couldn't fix it because he doesn't read ... whatever language that was ... and the menu was naturally in the newly selected language. I was displeased.)

I love Sesame Street!

A little dazed

T: I don't understand this section of the ITA. It says I'm supposed to determine the amount by which the total of taxable capital gains for the year from dispositions of property exceeds the amount by which allowable capital losses for the year from dispositions of property exceeds the allowable business investment losses for the year. You see, I think it's the multiple use of the word "exceeds" that is confusing me.

H: (standing in the door, glassy-eyed and holding a plate of catfood) Mush?

Da Face!

J makes a particular face quite often. It's a shy, mischievous little look that we think is extremely precious. We want to remember it, but we've not been able to get a photo of it yet. Finally, our friend Morgan managed to snap a shot of J making "the face".



A little closer now:



She also got a shot of him feeding his Panda Cheerios at a dim sum brunch. Shame little J wouldn't eat anything other than Cheerios, though. (Of course he wouldn't; why would he?)



On the growth front, J has reached 23 lbs now! He is still below the weight chart for his age, but his height is improving, and he is now just above the 10th percentile. So if we can just get his weight to follow suit, he may be okay yet.